Mid-Century Chickens!

So Terry over at HenCam http://hencam.com/category/thevintagehen/ has been posting pictures of her vintage apron collection--my favorite is the pink and turquoise happy little rooster on wheels--and got me inspired to share some of my own obnoxious vintage chicken-themed linens.  I had been telling her about my favorite chicken apron which is a 1950's 'black with pink/orange chickens and chicken wire' monstrosity.

So as promised to Terry, here is my more-50's-than-50's chicken apron:

I *DID* warn you.

Such a happy little orange-pink-green chicken family!  I'm sure that they aren't actually staring at each other, aghast with sheer horror...

I don't wear this apron much, my go-to cooking apron is one of those full-front things (still chicken themed of course, in the style of a baby chick feed bag) since when I cook I require more of a drop cloth affair than an apron.

Among my collection of vintage table linens I also have a little tablecloth which looks to be from the early 1960's.

In each corner are these cheerful, clueless rooboys, who clearly have no idea they are standing next to a cooking pot.

There is also this saucy little fellow in the middle.  He is presenting us with his backside, which is what all chickens do the minute you point a camera at them.

I'll have to get pictures of my other tacky chicken decorations, I love me some tacky crap so I've got some doosies.

Some Things Defy Explanation...

...in a rational, sane universe, anyway.

Like the tile we saw in the kitchen of the last house we toured--I've formed the hypothesis that the previous owners lost a bar bet. What else could explain not only the color of this tile, but the wooden edging, complete with little buttons to knock loose, never to be seen again? Wood edging, on a kitchen counter?

It's like they skipped off to the hardware store and chirped, "We'd like to see the tile that looks like dried vomit, please!"

It doesn't get any better up close.

Nasty. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the 70's era was a time of cultural tastelessness throughout America. Despite the kitchen tile the rest of the home is lovely and we've made an offer on it. Luckily for me I both own a hammer and know how to lay tile.

1972 Is Done & Hot, Hot, Hot...

The tacky 1972 calender is DONE!

And it's just as obnoxious and bright as it has every right to be, it's glorious.

The 3D effect of the stuffed fruit really makes it pop.

Stupid heat wave. Right now I've got 5 chickens inside who weren't taking the heat well at all. The rest are making do with the sprinkler running all day, sitting in the cool mud under the bushes. Our oldest hen, Chicken Sister, may not make it--she's an old, old lady and her time is nearing, I think. She's been sitting under J.'s desk all day.

This is my spiffy electronic indoor/outdoor thermometer that J. got me for Christmas. Today it's reading some numbers I'd rather not see...at just before 4PM, AFTER the hottest part of the day, it's 105 degrees. That's DOWN from what it was, 106.5. Not much better inside, where it's bearing out what J. always says--the best you can hope for is a 20 degree split: it's 87 degrees in here.

The humidity, not to be outdone, SUCKS as well--29% outside, 38% inside. This morning it was raining nice, hot rain. Gross. This is California, and we're not set up for that. Earthquakes yes, sticky disgusting humidity no.

I love the little man in his swim trunks. He ought to be screaming and melting.

1971 In Progress...

Well, the 1971 calender is nearing completion.

It's funny, in the instructions they tell you that while they give you extra seed beads since they allow that some beads are too narrow to fit over the needle, they only give you just enough sequins to complete the kit. No lie, I ended up with only 4 extra gold sequins once they were all used. Apparently in 1971 there was a sequin shortage along with gasoline.

Anyway, here it is in progress.

Taking pictures of the thing is difficult, here is another with different lighting--the felt is nice and white with no yellowing at all. Neither really shows the true look of it, it glimmers a WHOLE lot more than this.

At any rate, it's fun and cute, and I've finally gotten the hang of sewing on sequins so the thing progresses at an acceptable rate, and the amount of finger stabbing hasn't been bad.

My favorite is the Kinglet, he's got such a cute face!

I figure I'll have it entirely done in about a week, give or take.

Sequins, Sequins Everywhere...

...and I think I'm going blind.

Sewing on sequins is surprisingly fussy, any little wobble in the design stands out like a sore thumb. This is taking some good strong lighting and LOTS of patience. I also noticed a problem with the instructions and the 'finished' shot they used in the cover sheet for the kit--they forgot to do the head of the Goldfinch! In the instructions, they show his little head literally encrusted with beads & sequins.

I'm thinking he looks better with his head unsequined, except I may do the black patch on the top of his head. Entirely sequined I think he'd look like he had a growth on his head.

It's proving every BIT as tacky and cheesy as I had hoped, though.

Onward to glory, boys.

Home-Made Kitsch...

1970's style! In this case, two felt wall calenders, which were all the rage in the 60's and 70's. While they still make them today, the are a bit too tame...these little gems are just a perfect slice o' the hippy era.

The first one is from 1972. Mine in the actual kit sports groovy avocado green felt, the rest is as you see here. The idea is to cut out the felt fruit shapes, sew on sequins & beads, stuff them and attach them to the felt, giving a 3-D effect. Because otherwise, you know...it might not be noticed. And don't forget, you're gonna have to stare at this thing for an entire year. Good GOD.

I LOVE the designers name--Edna Looney is perfection itself.

A better look at the kit's cover page of the finished product. That toucan just looks SO happy to be there, and doesn't 1972 look like it's having fun?

Even after nearly 40 years, the felt looks brand new and the colors are vibrant. The toucan is made of black velvet with specialty sequins for his tail. It's amazing the thing survived this long!

The instructions. Now, kits these days take GREAT pains to explain every little thing, as if to an idiot child. NOT in 1972 bucko, this was IT. It's, 'whip stitch' this and 'blind stitch' that. And they only begrudgingly gave you this much help. I do love the elegant little note left by the inspector, though. Rarely do you see pre-printed 'thank you' notes with such panache.

On to the 1971 kit!

This one...this one...ahh, this one is a thing of wonder. At once the same and yet very different from the 1972 kit.

MORE SEQUINS, WE NEED MORE SEQUINS OVER HERE!

This one came from Sears, and Sears in the 70's pretty much had a lock on tacky. Here is the cover sheet showing the finished product. It crows about how the kit is made from something called 'Nylocraft', which I suspect is actually asbestos + felt in sheep's clothing. It has a rather creepy feel to the hand.

And yes, you have to SEW ON every single one of those damned beads & sequins, no lame glue shortcuts here.

The kit & instructions, such as they are. Again, they assume you already know basic sewing stitches and have more than two brains cells to work with.

A closer view of the felt, pre-beading. The colors are stamped on good & thick, by God, and the gold is blinding to the eye, even BEFORE the bead & sequin combo is overlaid. No shortcuts.

Detail shot. Words alone cannot describe how much I'm loving the font of the text and the sassy expression on the birds.

Can't wait to get these done. I'm gonna start with this one!

Another Ticky Tack Landmark Gone...

...and southern California is the sadder for it.

Movieland Wax Museum, which opened in 1962, closed forever on Halloween 2005. On March 11 of this year, they will auction off EVERYTHING in the building, and I do mean everything! Check out the auction catalog here:

http://www.icollector.com/viewAuctionSessionInfo.aspx?auctionSessionid=10798

Movieland was one of those kinda creepy touristy places where you would wander around and wonder how anything like this ever got started. The figures were badly done and nearly always damaged somehow...wigs askew, spitwads decorating the faces, fingers and noses chipped off, etc. But it was kinda cool because it wasn't big time, if that makes sense.

So anyway, if you want you can even buy the huge, glitteringly lit sign that runs along the top of the building. Or employees uniforms. Or wax, molds and wax figure making equipment (open your own wax museum!). Wax figures. Sets. Boxes of postcards. It goes on and on.

As I was looking through the auction catalog, it got sadder and sadder. The last time I went was back in 1978, and it only got more forlorn and abandoned-looking after that.

Movieland Wax Museum joins the rest of long-gone southern California theme parks such as the Japanese Deer Park and the Alligator Farm, which were nearby. I have a wonderfully tacky tin California souvenir plate that includes the big places like Disneyland, but also features Movieland, The Japanese Deer Park, The Alligator Farm, Marineland, Graumanns Chinese Theater, The Pike...

All the good stuff is gone.